You Wonder Why

So, I actually wrote this in 2013, but it still applies, but now I'm 21 and pay my own way, including to them...

You wonder why i stay in my room, why i dont talk to yall, why im always in a "pissy ass mood," or why im never home. You say its because im a teenager and im a "smartass bitch that always has to know everything." But honestly, thats not it at all. I just hate you. I hate being home. I hate being around you because you criticize everything I do. Why should i have to justify my actions. You wonder why we fight all the time. I havent been able to stand being in the same room with any of you in about five years. You all treat me like shit. You've pushed me so far into my depression that its permanently a part of me. I will never be able to be the person i want to be until i get out. I love you, mostly because i have to. You're my family and i have to live with you until i can move out. That day literally will not come fast enough. You always tell me, "you're gonna miss it when you leave." Why in the world would i miss fighting literally every day with all of you, being called a bitch, selfish, annoying, being pushed away because when i want/need to talk you're too busy watching your tv show, or being told that i am hated and being wished dead. Why would i miss crying myself to sleep at night because i'm so pissed off from you yelling at me for stupid bullshit or hitting me because i said something you didnt like. It feels like no matter what I do for you, you will find something to bitch about. Why would i miss being abused mentally and emotionally for as long as i can remember to the point where I can't function. Like a normal person my age can function without a problem. Like be happy or be with friends.